Freedom to Choose III—A Third Workshop at Valley State Prison for Women
By Drs. David Paul and Bonnie Paul
Valley State Prison for Women
USM Graduate Volunteers and inmates from the world's largest women's prison-
State Valley Prison for Women. The group joined together for another award-nominated
workshop offering some of USM's Soul-Centered communication skills.Advanced Workshop: Greeting Friends of the Heart
This workshop was expanded to include an advanced day for 35 inmates who had participated in Freedom to Choose previously. Seeing their shining faces felt a little like greeting old friends of the heart. The inmates and USM graduate volunteers spent an uplifting day together.
Valley State Prison for Women
Called “mentors,” the inmates who completed the advanced day-long workshop then served as eager and enthusiastic members of the Volunteer Assisting Team for the third beginning workshop, alongside USM grads. They distributed handouts, organized seating, and passed the microphone for sharing. They assisted on Saturday and Sunday, supporting the 96 new inmate participants in learning tools for getting free from their “Inner Prison.”
Flexibility: Don’t Leave Home Without It!
Offering a workshop in a prison setting presents unique challenges. Acceptance and flexibility are required. During this particular weekend, midday on Saturday, a pipe burst in the women’s bathroom. Eventually, the water was turned off in that section of the prison, and the inmates were required to return to their cells, which ended the workshop early. The USM team and inmates didn’t know if they would be able to return and complete the workshop on Sunday, since no one was available to fix the plumbing during the holiday weekend. This brought opportunities for everyone to practice the Spiritual Psychology skills of acceptance and holding a positive focus. All the workshop participants asked for blessings to be sent to the plumbing so that the workshop could resume the next morning. The Warden considered the workshop a priority and on Sunday portable bathrooms were wheeled into that section of the prison grounds. Only the Freedom to Choose participants were allowed out of their cells that day!
Volunteers Share
What is it like to bring some of the transformational skills and tools of Spiritual Psychology to the largest women’s prison in the world? The USM grads who volunteered for this project gave four days of their time and paid their own way to participate in this project. Why? Well, here is what a couple of them have to share about the value they received:
Arlene Stepputat, Class of ‘94
“From the moment I first encountered the women inmates, I felt welcomed. The women I met were courageous and honest and shared the truth of their own experiences. When I sat in the ‘Sharer’ chair, I honestly looked at those issues that have kept me limited in my ability to be free inside. The issues that came from the women were familiar: ‘Am I good enough? Will I be abandoned or loved? Will I succeed or fail?’ These are all questions I have asked myself many times in one way or another. As so often happens in trios, the perfect three people sit together, and with an amazing unraveling of limiting beliefs, a release of old hurts, and the salve of Self-Forgiveness, we all moved ahead as we each shared and loved one another. I was so touched by the loving the inmates had for me and for each other as we did the trios.
“I heard women, who might never experience the freedom of the outside world, claim for themselves the inner freedom that they now realized was theirs. They helped me touch into a deeper sense of gratitude for my physical world freedom and also for my USM skills that can help me tear down the self-imposed prison walls I sometimes create. Besides the amazing tool of applying loving to the place inside that hurts, laughter again proved itself to be a key to unlocking the cell doors of our hearts.
“However, over and over again, I kept thinking, ‘These women are like me.’ I have had different lessons, different opportunities, different experiences, but we all share in the experience of applying loving to the places inside of us that hurt. We share our fears and our dreams . . . and a lot of laughter too! I recognize that for me, the idea that there is an ‘us’ and a ‘them’ is another kind of prison. This experience was aptly captured by one inmate who said, ‘Thank you for not coming here to pity the poor prisoners. Thank you for seeing me as a person of value.’”
John Seeley, Class of ‘02
“The feeling as we relinquished the valuables we carried, our shoes, our belts, anything metal, was our first taste of what prison life means. Proceeding through the metal detector, the electronic doors, past the electrified fence and the razor wire, we experienced the initial level of isolation that the inmates do. As we walked into the ‘yard,’ eyes were upon us. I was amazed that a number of them were smiling. Some recognized those of us who were making a return trip.
“As we entered the gym, many of us were ‘first timers’ and hadn’t ever met a prisoner. We gathered our courage and joined hands to ask for Spirit’s help and blessings as we proceeded through the workshop. What lay ahead I hadn’t expected.
“The doors were opened and about 35 inmates came rushing in. To my surprise many of them were smiling. Some inmates greeted USM volunteers they recognized from previous trips there. The inmates mingled with us as we formed a circle. Now holding hands as a group, we again asked Spirit to bless and assist us through this process for the highest good of all concerned.
“I was seeing a new picture of ‘prisoners.’ Some were ‘lifers,’ some were ‘short-termers’ who would soon return to the ‘free world.’ Either way it didn’t seem to matter. They looked like you and me.
“I was inspired by the courage, wisdom, and love the women have. We were nurtured as much as we nurtured them. We found wisdom, as much or more than we brought. We found love: the love that we each have and sometimes need reminding is there. We took a little of each of them with us, as we each left a little of ourselves there.
“One participant said that while we were there, she wasn’t ‘in prison.’ That comment took me back full circle to a quote from Viktor Frankl that is read at the start of the workshop, ‘Everything can be taken away from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms—to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances, to choose one’s own way.’”
The Momentum Builds
At the close of the workshop, the inmates asked for more. One of the inmates who is serving a life sentence shared privately that until her first Freedom to Choose workshop, she hadn’t cared about anyone or anything. At the close of this workshop, she shared that even though she is a “lifer,” she is committed to assisting women who are about to leave prison in succeeding in the “free world.”
Another inmate shared with everyone:
“I appreciate each and every one of you for taking the time at your own expense to be here with me . . . I have learned so much about myself. I even forgive myself now. I feel refreshed, I feel like a rose. I wake up thanking God for having such wonderful angels. USM has made a big difference in my life. Thank you very much.
“You are missed when you go. When you return, it’s as if you never left. Thank you.”
Our next Freedom to Choose workshop is scheduled for October 20-23, 2005. All USM graduates are welcome to apply to the volunteer team. If you feel called to this work, please send an e-mail with your intention to Bonnie and David Paul at prisonproject@universityofsantamonica.edu. As we say at USM—Light ahead!
