Leading the Way to Peace—USM Grads in Amman Jordan
Rebecca Underwood ('04), with two Taiwanese monks who were among participants in USM's workshops in Amman, Jordan.There is certainly no shortage of opinions as to the root causes of the current Israeli-Palestinian conflict. One thing is clear—these roots run deep.
This lengthy and ongoing dispute raises a daunting question: Is there really a solution that can begin to lay a foundation for an entirely new relationship between Palestinians and Israelis? A firm foundation for peace?
The answer is yes—and the solution is as old as conflict itself. In fact, the solution is older—much older—than conflict, for it is at the heart and root of everything. It is timeless. The solution is Loving. But how, then, to implement the solution? That’s the big question!
In September 2000, Joanna Cottrell, a USM grad currently participating in USM’s newly created Soul-Centered Leadership Program (SCL), was part of the organizing committee for the Millennium Peace Summit. As a result, key figures in this organization became familiar with the work of USM, including a member of the international steering committee for the Women’s Global Peace Initiative and Special Advisor to the United Nations. In August 2004, Joanna was presented with a fascinating opportunity. Would she be willing to facilitate a Spiritual Psychology-based workshop as part of their Middle East Partnership for Peace Conference in Jordan for December 2004?
The vision for the conference was that 50 professional women from Palestine and 50 from Israel, as well as female religious and spiritual leaders from around the world, would come together for three days to explore specific initiatives to improve the environment for building peace. An international delegation of women would be present to support their efforts, and to see how best to steer resources to these professional women who are leading grassroots peace-building activities in their respective countries.
USM’s Soul-Centered Leaders Answer the Call
In the first SCL class in late September 2004, Joanna announced this unique opportunity and 20 classmates immediately volunteered to support the “Jordan Peace Project” in whatever capacity was needed. Joanna discovered her co-facilitator in fellow SCL classmate, Victoria Harper. With extensive knowledge and experience in the Middle East, Arabic language skills, and facilitation experience, it was clear that Victoria was an ideal choice for co-facilitator. Her classmates agreed and an in-class fundraiser provided the necessary resources to pay for Victoria’s trip.
In addition, two other SCL participants, Elaine Robinson and Gayle Kryzak, voiced their intention to be part of the Jordan team. Further, USM Grads, Julia Frankel, Maya Pool, and Rebecca Underwood heard about the project and also stepped forward to join the team, bringing their number to seven. Thus was born “The Jordan Seven.” In addition, others in the USM community offered logistical support in preparation for the trip. Once again, members of USM’s graduate community were stepping forward to answer Spirit’s call to action.
USM’s President, Dr. Ron Hulnick, spent considerable time with Joanna and Victoria revising three of the core Basic Skills used in the Master’s Degree Program in Spiritual Psychology. Ron shared, “It was clear that the specific goal here was to facilitate dialogue so that members of each community could have the experience of really being heard. We reworked the skills to specifically support this happening and named the workshop “Dialogue Skills for Influencing Change.”
Ron also sought the input of USM’s Academic Vice President, Dr. Mary Hulnick. Mary also read the initial position paper that the team had been sent outlining the goals for the conference. She concluded, “It was clearly stated that the workshop was not to be a ‘competition of lamentations.’ I knew immediately that the communication skills that we offer as the foundation of the Programs here at USM, along with the Soul-Centered place inside that we guide our students to communicate from, could offer great potential value.” This proved to be very accurate!
And so the foundation was laid where the potential for answering an essential question, “Could three one-hour sessions in the company of seven USM graduates anchored in the Loving really have a positive impact upon ancient resentments and animosities?”
“The Jordan Seven” arrive
“Jordan is a beautiful country,” shared Joanna Cottrell. “There is a deep, powerful, loving energy present, and a richness abounding in the sea, the sky, and in the hearts of the people. The weather was bright, sunny and warmish during the day, cool at night. The Dead Sea resort where the conference was held looked like Ali Baba's cave, built around an ancient village renovated into a setting overflowing with dense foliage of fragrant rosemary and jasmine, olive trees, flowering plants and bushes, Islamic fountains, and mosaics. It truly felt as if we were walking through history.”
While the team had been informed that they would need to be flexible in responding to possible changes in the conference timing, they had no idea of number of challenges they would experience. When the co-facilitators were asked to not use the music they had selected as it was too “western” and might offend the participants, Joanna’s response to the Team was, “We are being given plenty of opportunities to practice acceptance—and as for the music, well let’s just work to the rhythm of our hearts!”
At the top of the list of challenges was the notification that a group of sixteen Palestinians were being detained at the border as they crossed from Gaza into Israel. Apparently, there were roadblocks placed at certain checkpoints due to explosions on the border the previous night and the Gaza delegation was being detained there. When the Team heard this, they sent an immediate appeal to the USM and MSIA communities for Light for the highest good. Although it seemed unlikely that the delegation from Gaza would be able to attend (these situations are taken very seriously and almost always result in people being refused passage), by late that evening all sixteen arrived! Although they were exhausted, they were also optimistic about the possibilities ahead.
Listening With Acceptance launched in the Middle East
Vitoria Harper ('04) and Joanna Cottrell ('04), co-facilitators for the reamrkable workshops held in Amman, Jordan. The next day, with great enthusiasm and excitement, the first session began with six people in the room—five of whom didn’t speak English! Joanna spoke about the peace meditations that start each USM class, so often sending peace to their region. “It’s as if the Loving that we had been sending here over the years has now beckoned us to follow.” Victoria spoke of her 20-year love affair with the Middle East and how deeply she appreciated the kindness, generosity, and open-heartedness of the people. For Victoria, returning to Jordan was like returning home to family.
Early on, a woman from Gaza, a psychiatrist, shared her frustration with the format of the workshop. She wanted all the participants to sit in a circle and face each other. She was assured by the facilitators that they would soon be working in small groups. Getting into trio format was a new discipline for all of the participants—one that brought forward some interesting moments of chaos. As it turned out, these were important moments for demonstrating leadership, and not always in an external way. As one of the USM group shared, “In many ways the Conference reflected the chaos of the current conflict. We recognized that our opportunity was to hold the energy of constructive dialogue inside of us. Then, when the external structure broke down momentarily, we were able to stay in the Loving, regroup, and move on effectively. It worked every time . . . eventually!”
By the time the first session found its stride, there were more than 30 participants in the room. Women from Gaza, Jerusalem, the Bekka Valley, Bethlehem, Sudan, Thailand, and three beautiful, bald Taiwanese nuns all came together to do Listening With Acceptance—the focus of the first trio.
The start of the first trio began with an inspirational quote from USM’s Chancellor, John-Roger: “When you are in acceptance, you are in profound peace. This is the place you want to be when you have decisions to make. This is the place from which you can make an impact on the world for the better.”
Once the trios settled in, everything went smoothly. The women willingly sat with trio partners from other countries who they didn’t know, and it appeared they were actually following the instructions! As the trio time progressed, the loving energy in the room expanded, and it was clear that the participants were fully engaged.
It was reported that in other sessions at the Conference, people were continually walking in and out of the meeting room, some leaving in anger and frustration. It showed the power of the USM Basic Skills, and the energy they are infused with, that once the trios began, not only did no one leave but also when it was time to end, several people were still eagerly sharing. Said Victoria, “The sharing was simply amazing—authentic, honest, succinct, and clear. All of a sudden we were in a USM classroom that just happened to be in Amman, Jordan!”
At the completion of the trio, the psychiatrist from Gaza rose to share. “The Jordan Seven” quietly held their breath and prepared to practice Listening With Acceptance. With words that touched us all, she shared, “I truly had a profound experience. I was listening with acceptance to an Israeli and hearing that her concerns are similar to mine. I was really surprised. My suggestion would be that next time you arrange us in trios with one Palestinian, one Israeli and one international person. This would be the best way.” The Team wisely said “Right” and set an intention to facilitate this arrangement in the second session.
Another woman stood up to share, “This is great. This simple skill would do so much to help avoid the basic misunderstandings that turn into big disasters.”
As the first day drew to a close, a large contingent of Israelis arrived, and the USM delegation mingled with as many of them as possible to encourage them to join the second session the following day.
Challenges . . . and Blessings
The second day began with “The Jordan Seven” calling in the Light and setting intentions. They all felt the profound Presence of Spirit. And, were they going to need it! Over the next few hours, they faced total unpredictability, constant challenges, cancellations, repeated last-minute changes, and finally, extraordinary blessings. As coordinator Elaine Robinson said, “We lived a lesson we had experienced in our Soul-Centered Leadership class, that of chaos being a doorway to creativity.”
The second workshop was scheduled for 11 a.m. The team set up the room only to be told by the organizers that they could not have the chairs in trio format and that the room would have to immediately be rearranged to the way it originally was. So the team moved into cooperation (and moved a lot of furniture!), and then, at 12 noon, the workshop was cancelled altogether due to a plenary session that was running two hours late. Another learning opportunity!
The second session was finally rescheduled, but not before the room location changed three more times, making it very challenging for participants to find the location. The session finally came to rest in the smallest room available, just large enough for fifteen people. The team was overheard joking that they all qualified for Advanced Master’s Degrees in Acceptance and Flexibility!
Finally, the second session began with only one person, an incredible Palestinian woman from Ramallah who had attended the first day and had offered us her services as an Arabic translator. As she was the only guest, Victoria and Joanna decided to just connect by asking her about her life. She provided fascinating insight into the reality of the “three Palestines”—West Bank, Gaza, and East Jerusalem. She pointed out that, given the travel restrictions in these areas, they might as well be three different countries.
She made an important point, “Before we dialogue with the Israelis, we should have a chance to dialogue with each other!” In addition to the significant barriers to getting permission to travel, the women from Gaza who attended did so at great personal risk. Many did not tell their friends and family for fear of being judged as collaborators or traitors. It was also for this reason that the Conference was neither announced nor covered in the media.
As the conversation went on, a woman from Gaza arrived followed by several others. This group was shortly joined by an Israeli psychiatrist, an American Swami, and an Israeli Knesset member, whom the team had met earlier that morning. Ultimately, fifteen women materialized and filled the room to capacity, all eager to learn the skill of Perception Checking. Five perfect trios—Spirit in action! And, the Light created some intriguing trio partners, one of which stands out in particular in the memory of USM Volunteer, Julia Frankel.
“This is the first time I have really listened.”
“I was the third person, the silent observer, in a trio with two psychiatrists—one Israeli and one Palestinian,” Julia remembers. “As they sat down, I felt the weight of their history coming with them. It was tangible. Then, as the trio progressed, all that just fell away and they became two powerful women sharing their experience. To have been a witness to, and a vehicle for this level of transformation was such a blessing. It was truly remarkable and I will never forget those moments.”
At the end of the trio, one of the two psychiatrists stood up and said, “I realize that when I am working with my patients, I’m usually just waiting to tell them how they are wrong. This is the first time I have really listened!” Her trio partner, the second psychiatrist, also had something to say. “My politics are very left-wing and I feel sympathy for the Palestinian cause. Yet, through listening in this way I realized that I have never really understood what goes on for these women. I realize that being a leftist isn’t enough.”
A Palestinian shared, “Now I see these Israeli women not as opponents, but as people with good hearts. This is the first time I have ever encountered an Israeli in person. I found a crossroad to the Israelis in the discussion. People here have goodness inside. It felt so good to have the chance to get up and share. I felt heard, and I heard, too”
Choosing the Loving
Although the team was only able to hold two of the three sessions that had been planned, they left Jordan filled with joy, gratitude, and Light. As Joanna put it, “The challenges that we faced only served to magnify the blessings we received, and the depth of the friendships that were formed moved us at least as much as our presence may have moved Conference participants. All seven of us would return in an instant to pick up where we left off. We witnessed firsthand that Love truly is the universal language.”
How is it that the sessions facilitated by the USM group appear to have been so successful, even as others were challenged with discord and argument? At a debriefing luncheon several weeks later to honor “The Jordan Seven,” USM’s Academic Vice President, Mary Hulnick, shared this perspective with the seven volunteers: “You are all wonderful Ambassadors of USM, of your Selves, and of the Light! You have succeeded through making Loving the most important thing.”
This then, is peace in action—choosing back into the loving, one heart and one mind at a time. And at the heart of this particular success are the transformational USM skills, the service consciousness and loving leadership of a committed volunteer team, and the Presence and guidance of Spirit.
And what’s next? “Who knows where this is going?” responded USM’s President, Ron Hulnick. “We have already received donations from people wanting to support the next steps of this Project. We now have invitations from Gaza, East Jerusalem, and Ramallah to evaluate, and we will determine where we go from here. It’s very exciting and USM Grads are delighted to hear that their University is doing this kind of work. They are enthusiastic about supporting it and being involved. The Jordan experience has only served to highlight once again that, any time any of us experience disturbance, the first place to plant the seeds of peace is in our own hearts. Then, and only then, are we at all qualified to share that peace with others.”
